"Stories that Bind" response

The thesis statement in this article is clear: "The single most important thing that you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative." He backs up this claim with quotes from psychologists and findings from studies. He describes how learning about their families contributes to child's sense of belonging. "They know they belong to something bigger than themselves."

I agree that having a sense of family narrative helps children maintain an enlarged perspective. The author writes, "When faced with a challenge, happy families, like happy people, just add a new chapter to their life story that shows them overcoming hardship." Everyone knows that a story without any conflict isn't very interesting. Looking at their life as a story helps children to see the beauty in the hard times and to look at the bigger picture. I also agree that having a family mission statement is good because it gives the family a clearer purpose and direction.

Although I think the author makes a good point that knowing about one's family strengthens a family's sense of identity, I think the real reason that learning about one's family heritage helps families is because of what is required for that to happen. In order for children to learn about their ancestors, parents must spend quality time talking with their children and telling them about their ancestors. That doesn't usually happen in a methodical way with parents rattling off answers to a list of questions, but rather an organic conversation involving stories and the imparting of wisdom. I think quality time is what really binds a family together. Parents who neglect their children or are rather absent from their children's lives tend to have more familial problems.

That's not to say their is any foolproof way to rear a family because I don't think there is. There are so many factors that affect familial relations and some are beyond our control. But I do think that spending time in family is vital, and the studies revealing the importance of families eating together , such as the ones noted in "Of Ketchup and Kin" confirm that.  In essence, I feel that families who spend more time together talk more openly with each other and know each other better. I agree with the author that family traditions strengthens families too.